Can You Smell It In The Air?

May 4, 2010

Mama and Papa Malkin have landed in Pittsburgh. The entire Penguin’s playoffs change now.

Super Borscht ftw.

Do it, Pens.

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What Happened?

January 28, 2010

Did someone slip some the Sens some of Mama Malkin’s borscht? Because how they’ve been playing lately has been mind-blowing. Wtf yo. It wasn’t so long ago when the Sens were out of a playoff spot, and I was ready to drink my way to the early off-season. Now things have turned around, and the Senators have won seven in a row, and things are starting to look a lot like they did back in ’07 when the Senators managed to make it all the was to the Stanley Cup Final. I’m still bitter about that. Let’s not get me started on the Ducks. Somehow, in the past seven games, the Senators have managed to beat some of the League’s best, Chicago, Boston, New Jersey, and New York. The Senators are winning. And I am less likely to kill myself.

Tonight will be interesting. The fifth place Senators will be taking on the fourth place Penguins.

On TSN. That means Pierre McGuire. Ohmyfuck, I’m cracking out a bottle of tequila and playing the drinking game. Pierre cannot ruin this for me.

There will be blood.


Following Stanley

June 22, 2009

I apologize for the lack of major updates in the last few weeks, but this has been mostly because I’ve been too busy freaking out about the Pens winning the Cup  studying for final exams. Many people wonder what happens to a hockey blog during the off-season where there’s no hockey. Well, hockey extends further than 82 games and playoffs. During the post-season, some crazy shit can happen. Like, for example, still not knowing who’s going #1 overall in the draft next week. This is the first time this has happened in 6 years. The last time people were this uncertain about the draft was in 2003 when the Pens opted for Marc-Andre Fleury instead of Eric Staal. Personally, I think the Islanders will go for Tavares. Either that or make a trade *coughcough* Brian Burke *coughcough* Don’t get me wrong, I think any of the top-5 guys this year can make a drastic difference in that hockey club, I just think that with all the media/record breaking talent that Tavares has he’ll be the obvious choice. Another think that happens in the post season is the free-agency madness. And I mean MADNESS. On the Pens lineup, a couple of interesting names might not resign, such as Petr Sykora and the American Hero Rob Scuderi. If Shero doesn’t resign those two, he will MOST definitely become number one on my hitlist. First, you trade Colby, then you don’t sign Scuds and Syki? Okay, dude. Redeem yourself. Colby Freaking Armstrong is also a RFA at the end of the year. Do it, Shero, do it. He’s more popular than Santa Clause in Pittsburgh. You’ll be doing your fans a favor. I (with the help of Erika and Roxanne) wrote a letter to Ray Shero, we’ll scan it and post it up soon. It’s really quite epical. So, all summer, you can count on me to fully recap Lord Stanley’s summer. I’ll make sure to be the first to post the pictures of Max Talbot pissing into it, Sidney Crosby proposing to it, and Geno and the Malkin’s eating Borsht out of it. Unfortunately, I missed the NHL awards the other night. I did hear that O-V won the Hart. Psht. Whatever, he can have that trophy, Geno and I are plenty happy with our trophy. Damn straight, Alex, we went there. And anyone else hear the digs Boudreau made at the Pens? Uhm, douche alert! Just when you think you love that guy, he has to go and say something like THAT. Ugh. I thought it was REALLY classy that Max went to Vegas with Geno, even though he wasn’t, and probably never will be, nominated for an award. Whatever, he’s still MVP in my eyes.