Recap: Pitt/Chi

December 6, 2009

Guess who was booooooooooooooooooed all game? Even in the warmup.

Was it :

a) Cappy

Sidney Crosby #87 of the Pittsburgh Penguins celebrates with the Stanley Cup after defeating the Detroit Red Wings by a score of 2-1 to win Game Seven and the 2009 NHL Stanley Cup Finals at Joe Louis Arena on June 12, 2009 in Detroit, Michigan.  (Photo by Harry How/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** Sidney Crosby

b) An Asian Cowboy:

or c) This guy:

If you guessed c) Marian Ho$$a, you were right. You win a Stanley Cup. Ho$$a doesn’t.

mm , inviting , isn't it Hoss.

A few points on the game:

  • The men who speak into microphones, drowning out the real sounds of the game were saying that this is the Stanley Cup Finals preview. Yep. I called this a while ago.
  • Duncan Keith’s hair is my emotional support for the loss of Sex Hair.
  • Oh yeah, the guy who ruined the Blackhawks for me scored. Meh. The only way he could get the goal was if he dove into the net.
  • Billy Guerin had a bitchfest with Brent Seabrook.
  • Orpik threw a glove at Jonny T’s face. LOLZ.
  • Geno bear-hugged Colin Fraser in a middle of a face-off and starting throwing punches to his face. Not much came outta that.
  • There was a lot of this :

  • And a lot of this:

  • Oh, the Niemi kid was pretty insane. He was on acid or something, cause he didn’t stop moving all night.
  • Ditto for MAF.
  • One word: JStaal.
  • I want him.
  • Verbeauty scores in OT. Kay.
  • 2-1 final.
  • Sid was out.
  • Doesn’t count when Sid id out.
  • Got a point.
  • Hawks got two.
  • I’m happy.
  • Jordan Staaaaaaal.
  • I miss Adam Burish.
  • Max Talbot looked pretty god.
  • I miss Adam Burish.
  • Adam.
  • Burish.

Look What I Found …

August 30, 2009

Somebody told me that my Team Canada boys were getting their pictures taken recently, but I hadn’t found them ’till now. It was a long hard search, but after a few hours, I found them.

So here’s an excerpt of my favorites.

Tyra taught Vinny to smile with his eyes. But she’s disappointed with him because he has a hung over look on his face.

B+

Stevey’s got a great smile, but he’s flashing us a bit of a stink eye here. Tut, tut, Mase. Keep your eyes open!

B-

Then there’s Cappy. Most of the fan girls would say he looks absolutely scrumptious here, with his one curl falling over his forehead and flashing a huge grin. However, I’m not one of those girls. In fact, I think he LOOKS like a girl. But other than that, not too shabby, Captain.

B

I think the beard adds an extra ten pounds on Nasher here. Shave, bud. 

B

Look who it is. It’s the ever handsome, jaw dropping, heart melting Patrick Sharp. What a great smile, but I think he went too far with the hair.

A

I was hysterical when I found this. His face is priceless, like a kid at Disney World, and his pants are revolting. Shape up, Patty.

C

He looks like the geeky kid everyone has in their school. Or like he sees that you’re fly’s down but isn’t going to tell you. He’s mocking you. But I like the hair, so …

B

Can you see it? I can. Right there, under his chin. Is that? Another chin? Why yes, it is. Fuck-a-doodle-doo. Mike Green is a fatty! But he has the eyebrows working for him. And the hair … Oh, the hair.

B-

JORDAN STAAL YOU ARE SUCH A TEASE. Ladies, this is what your standards should be. You except no one who doesn’t have hair like his. Or the shit-eating grin. Or the swagga that says: “You bitches look at me I’m fucking fly. I’m a Stanley Cup Champion!” HOT.

A+

Marriage has aged you, Jason. It looks like you’re balding. But you know, you are working that jersey.

B

Bonjour, Marc-Andre. Voulez vous couchez avec moi ce soir? SEX.

A+

Has Eric done something to his hair? It looks oddly like his brother’s. Maybe he’s trying to remember what it’s like to be a Stanley Cup Champion.

B+

He’s got the “I just got laid” grin on his face, and the “I just rolled out of bed hair.” He’s all grown up. *sniff*

A

Brent Seabrook knows how to make a girl scream. Fierce.

A

Hey. Jonathan Toews. Do me now. This picture takes away every female’s virginity. This picture has Tyra Banks CRYING with pride. This picture has me short of breath. This picture is …

A++