Maybe Not Your Forte, Jonathan.

January 8, 2010

Jonathan Toews got in a fight a few nights ago. Yeah, you heard me right. Fight. Gloves off, full-fledged fight. Okay, so maybe he had his ass kicked, but he’s trying right. I’m proud.


Okay, Uh, What?

October 23, 2009

I think I speak for everybody who watched the Ottawa/Nashville game like night when I say: WTF?

That was most definitely the most bizarre Sens game of the season. The Sens were off to a bad start early in the first period when Picard deflected a Suter shot only 5 minutes into the first period, giving Nashville an early 1-0 lead. Picard went on to get a hattrick for Nashville — OH WAIT! HE PLAYS FOR OTTAWA! LOLOLOL, I COULDN’T TELL CAUSE HE SCORED SOO MANY GOALS FOR THE PREDS. But really, no offense, Alex. I really do like you. Just an off-night I suppose.

End of first: 3-0 Nashville. Fuck-a-doodle-doo, right?

Nothing really happens in the second period except for a smorgasbord of questionable penalties. McCreary wants BEEF from me. Or just for me to book him an optometrical appointment.

Kayso, third period.

Chris Campoli decided, “Heh, why not try and score? Like, we’re losing to Nashville, we got nothing to lose”

92293973, NHLI via Getty Images /National Hockey League

Score. 3-1

Shortly after that, Nicky Foligno was all like “WHAA?! CHRIS SCORED?! AWH, MAN. NOW, I NEED A GOAL.”

92293981, NHLI via Getty Images /National Hockey League

Cha-chiiing. 3-2

Momentum is building. Milan Michalek’s all like “LOLZ, I LIKE SCORE GOALZ. CUZ I’M FLYYY LIKE TAT.”

92293965, NHLI via Getty Images /National Hockey League

Dany who? 3-3

Then, the Hockey Gods decide to put this thing called Shea Weber on full blast right after our power session. Meh.

92293444, Getty Images /Getty Images Sport

Betch. 4-3

Have no fear, ridic Jason Spezza passes and Anton Volchenkov were there to save the day.

85805614, NHLI via Getty Images /National Hockey League

I love it when Volchie scores. 4-4

Next up: That Suter guy scores again. Not in the mood to show is face on here. 5-4. Everyone’s leaving, 1.6 seconds left, and whaaa? CHRIS PHILLIPS SCORES. LIKE WTF?! When was the last game that Anton Volchenkov AND Chris Phillips scored?! Yeaaahh. Never. Anyways, buildings going batshit crazy.

92239676, NHLI via Getty Images /National Hockey League

Like a boss. 5-5

Overtime: heartbreak city.

A bunch of penalties are called, 4-3 and then whatshisface scores to end like WTF-fest at the Scotiabank place.

To sum up the game in a few words: Most confusing 2 and 1/2 hours of my life.

Go Sens Go!

5-2-1


Waiting.

August 16, 2009

Patrick Kane’s trial was today. And I’m currently sitting on my couch, writing this in an skeptical, jumpy mood. Every time TSN says Patrick Kane, I jump out of my seat. I’m antsy. I’m nervous. I’m goddamned worried. I know, however, that Partick Kane is going to walk away from this trial innocent. Let’s face it. We’re never going to know whether or not he actually did anything. That’s not information that he’s going to give away to the public. Sure, he can release all the statements that he wants saying that he’s done nothing wrong and that he was confused about why he was in this position in the first place, but we all know that maybe that’s not the full truth. He has a good lawyer, and his lawyer is going to do everything it takes to get people to believe that he’s innocent, whether its I don’t know, bribing JR’s lawyer into saying that the truth was stretched by the media, or stating that Kane was merely a witness in his cousin’s felony. Patrick Kane has money. And money buys you a good lawyer. And good lawyers can get you out of just about anything. But I’m still sitting here waiting in anticipation for any news, because anything can happen. Team Patrick.